Highs and Lows

I had hoped that we wouldn't be needing to visit the RCH for a very long time (ever!), but last Sunday we were back there with Dylan. After our picnic at the Fitzroy Gardens with friends we started to make our way to the anti CSG/fracking rally in the City, when Dylan suddenly came down with a very painful earache. Given that we were nearby, we decided to go to the Royal Childrens. If Dylan had not been in so much pain, and so distressed - crying inconsolably and refusing to take any pain relief I am sure Peter and I would not have found it quite so difficult coping with all the memories of being in the Emergency Department with Leroy.

Thankfully, Dylan's pain subsided whilst waiting to see a doctor, "Mum, can I do some break dancing now?" and after a 'middle ear infection diagnosis' by the GP, we were able to go home.  Irrepressible Dylan in the car on the way home pipes up and says, "We've had a great day today, we had a picnic and we went to the doctor, and stayed aaaallll day". 

After my experience of this visit, I was beginning to think that I hadn't healed or worked through anything - the intensity of my feelings of anxiousness, hopelessness, stress and upset was as much as I felt I could bear.  But then something happened today.

Coming home from work I sat next to a woman I hadn't really talked with properly since Leroy was born. We both ride our bikes and take them on the train to/from Melbourne and often say hello.  I knew the conversation would lead to Leroy.  Today it didn't feel awkward or difficult to talk about Leroy. I think because I was ok with telling her, she was ok with hearing it. She asked me questions and shared some things about herself that I didn't know, and I think we both left our conversation feeling more connected with warmth in our hearts. A definite victory.

A friend asked me the other day how I was, and whether I was getting back into the community.  It wasn't until I started telling her about the different things we are involved with that I realised that we are!  Although on some 'bad days' I find it hard, it is a huge blessing and has helped us find our passion for life again.   

In case you are wondering, as my friend was, this is what we have been up to.

I am the coordinator of the Natural Parenting Playgroup in Bacchus Marsh and through this I met a wonderful woman who runs Soul Food in Bacchus Marsh (providing a hot lunch once a week for 50ish members of the community who are in need of a meal/company/support). I have started getting involved and I love it.

I am also secretary of the Moorabool Environment Group (MEG) and along with my friend Sarah we hold a Food Swap once a month in Bacchus Marsh. Those of you who know me, know how passionate I am about our environment, both locally and globally and I absolutely love being involved with MEG and making a difference.

Peter, Dylan and I have also become involved with the Friends of Werribee Gorge and Long Forest Mallee and have been planting trees (not far from here) and getting involved in other tree planting/weeding activities. Great for the soul, and something I have been wanting to do for a long time.

Then there is our local choir, A Choired Taste of Gospel. We have our big gig coming up on 8th Sept and we are fundraising for 3 families - for Connor, Sienna and Noah (kids dealing with various medical conditions). We are currently doing our circuit of warm-up performances at local places and tomorrow night we are performing at a retirement village.  I find music and singing very healing.

Peter has also fulfilled on a long held ambition, to get involved with our local radio station, Apple FM. He now has a show on Tuesday nights "Tuesday Folk" and is absolutely loving it.

So I guess life is getting into a 'new normal' groove and Leroy continues to teach us lessons as he lives on in our hearts and memories.